Appliance Graveyard

In our breakfast room, we have a hutch. The bottom of that hutch is a storage area I like to call the Appliance Graveyard. It is the final home and eternal resting place of all the kitchen gadgets I just had to have, but never use. Some of them are more trouble than they're worth, some just don't perform as advertised and some are just junk. I've got quite an eclectic collection: there is the Seal-A-Meal that was going to revolutionize my freezer; there is the George Foreman Grill that I've never been able to properly clean and which seems to have only two settings, raw or hockey puck; there is the Ninja which was supposed to make juicing fun and exciting; there is a Salad Shooter which has too many pieces and is a major pain to clean; there is a mandoline which, unless I want to slice 10 pounds of potatoes, is way more complicated than getting out a knife and a chopping board; there is a huge electric griddle which takes up too much counter space, won't fit in the dishwasher and heats unevenly; there is the fondue set which was supposed to provide hours of gaiety for dinner guests, but just was a fire hazard; and we can't forget the small electric ice cream maker that claims to make one dish of homemade ice cream in minutes, except that the motor would seize up and you'd be left with a bowl of runny custard ... you get the gist.

You'd think I'd stop buying appliances and gadgets, and for the most part, I have -- but every so often, something catches my eye, and ... well, I can't help myself.

The other day, I was in WalMart, buying something responsible and mature (like Metamucil and raw spinach ... I wasn't scouring the aisles for half-price Easter candy! I wasn't, and you can't prove otherwise!) when something jumped into my line of vision. It was a new appliance that I didn't have, but oh! I needed it, badly!!

A breakfast sandwich maker!! I could make Egg McMuffins at home, in only five minutes!! I picked it up, put it in my cart, put it back on the shelf, picked it up again ... took a picture of it and texted it to my husband (because who, when they're at work doesn't want to be interrupted by a text message about a breakfast sandwich maker??) and then put it back and walked away.

No room in the Appliance Graveyard for another resident.

My husband went to WalMart today to buy a bucket. He came home with a plastic car-washing bucket -- and a breakfast sandwich maker.

So, tomorrow, I'll either be stuffing my face with homemade, delicious Egg McMuffins ... or I'll be clearing space in the hutch for the newest addition to the Appliance Graveyard.

I hope it works. I like the idea of breakfast in 5 minutes, but my past history with "change your life" appliances and gadgets isn't the best.

I am, however, touched by how sweet my honey is, that he knew I wanted it -- and he knew the odds are good that it'll end up in the hutch, nestled against the Texas shaped hamburger press that insists on cutting off the Panhandle, but he bought it anyway.

That's love.

Maybe (probably not, but MAYBE) I'll even get up at 4:00 a.m. to fix him a delicious and nutritious homemade breakfast sandwich. Ok, I won't ... but when I get up, I'll fix MYSELF one, and I'll think of him and how wonderful he is.

And if anyone wants to come shop in my Appliance Graveyard, drop me a line. I can use the extra space in the hutch.